Rambles: Bad Mornings

Some mornings i wake up with a sense of restlessness..

i feel as if the world has slipped under my feet..

i dont know where this feeling comes from..

from lack of sleep of from the sense of ssadness..

but im not sad.. im happy happy as can be..

I get out of bed and a reach for my glasses and they werent where i put them..

so the light is on now and hurting my eyes..

i squint and i squable with myself for not sleeping patiently..

i move and snore and grunt to find them and they arent there..

but im not lost.. im very found as found as i can be..

I finally say fuck this and get out of bed..

but my feet just dont find themselves and i fall back into bed..

i rub my eyes and try to get my grounding back..

but im numb and im restless.. i just cant feel..

But i can.. i can feel.. as much as my body can bear.

I finally just lie back down and i try to figure whats wrong..

i lie on my back but im not comfortable...

i lie on my stomach but im not comfortable..

i begin o think its not just me.. im just sleepy..

But im awake.. as awake as my mind can take...

So i give in to all of it..

the body pain and the restlessness and the blanket..

and i turn to my side and i feel my glasses break under me..

and i wonder whether its even worth getting out of bed today..

But im still asleep.. as asleep as i can be..

i havent woken up and all this is just a dream from which i shall awake when the positive is back..

when the positive is back..

when the positive is back..

when the positive is back..